Category: Donald Campaign

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The Donald Campaign Message 02/21/2016

The title of my campaign message this week sounds a little like a play in the Super Bowl, doesn’t it?  And by the way, how bout’ them Broncos!  Just lovin’ that score.  If they can win so, can the “Real Donald.”
Yep, it’s four states down and 46 to go before we know the winner of the 2016 presidential race.  South Carolina and Nevada were good to us.  I’m pretty sure I picked up a half of a delegate in each state. That should produce a whole, unless the government has found a way to tax delegates too and then I might only end up with 2/3 of a delegate.  Either way, it exceeds expectations!  We’re on a roll.
Speaking of rolls!  Notice how people just keep fighting around the world? Everyone wants to chime in, According to the U.N. there are 10 major wars going on around the world today with 32 intrastate wars.  A President has to have a plan.  So,here’s my plan:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=QETGfVOi1mA
Put all of the leaders of these countries in a gym and let them have 250 marshmallows.  The first person knocked out with a marshmallow is out of the war. This continues until a winner has taken over all of the territory of the losing leader. But, you ask, what happens if no one is knocked out by a  flying marshmallow?  Ah, they all return home and a contract is signed that they cannot war with each other until everyone on earth returns to being a farmer and likes beats.  Humm! I wonder how long that will be?
Farmer? That reminds me, we have a travesty in America. We need more people to return to their roots, farming. Hundreds of acres of farmland. No more cry babies! Oh, I hurt my toe, I stumbled on the carpet. I’m laid up for weeks. My pinkie finger hurts, I had to lift up a can of soup. Laid up for months. That’s what we hear, all of the whiners! Let’s take care of that, shall we?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7yZdOl_e_c
Paul Harvey has it right.  We need the people who run this country to care about the country, the people who live in it and, about the future of America. All we have in Washington now, is the whiners. Why? because they have no “common sense,” which is defined as “sound judgement in practical matters.”  Sound judgement? The politicians in Washington think this has something to do physic’s, like giving an opinion about sound waves.  And every time they have or give an opinion, they think they need to “write a bill” or “make a law.” Yep, let’s make a new law that restricts how much “common sense” people can have.  Practical matters? we better write a bill limiting the use of common sense in practical matters.  We wouldn’t want a country full of people that make good decisions, just because it is the right thing to do, do we?  After all, “according to a new estimate, Congress has had a full work week just 14 percent of the time since 1978.” I mean, “Congress said they planned to address an important report next week because it’s already Tuesday.”  Jimmy Kimmel
I guess it just goes to show, “You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make him think.” Milton Berle
Lest we think, it’s just our politicians, how about this; “if the cash you doled out for a Las Vegas cab ride hurt your wallet, it’s not all in you head–auditors in Nevada (by the way, the state, where they just voted for a woman, who I won’t name, who received $3.15 million from Wall Street businesses for speeches given in 2013, according to CNN) also think taxi rates are outrageous. Las Vegas area cabs are overcharging customers to the tune of $47 million a year.” Deseret News
That makes me wonder?  Do you remember when gas prices were high and going up? Restaurants, airlines and trucking services charged an excise tax on deliveries of food, meals and airline tickets. WHY? because they said gas cost them so much.  Now that gas is below $2.00, did these restaurants, airlines or trucking companies give that money back to the customers? Oh! they forgot. I’m sure it’s coming next week. 
Give us an honest farmer.  How about an honest Native American. We kicked them off of their land and gave them some sub-par desert property.
We need housewives, mothers, firemen, pilots and just, plain good people to run our country.  I’m thinking that anyone who attended this show in 1964 is probably a prime candidate for a political office.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=JC0MEF6d1eU
If you can scream like that, you should be able to be heard from the floor of the chamber. Besides, you don’t have to say much of importance and you only have to show up on Mondays and Tuesdays.
Carry on till tomorrow!
The Real Donald ✌
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The Donald Campaign Message 02/14/2017

Now that the New Hampshire primary is behind us and New England is buried in 4 feet of snow and temp’s could feel as low as minus 35, it’s time to move on to the south and west.
Thanks to all of my New Hampshire supporters who braved the cold, waited until the last minute to make a decision on who to vote for, decided to be neither republican or democrat and basically, took the day off to go skiing.  Way to Go!
We continue on our way to Bictory.  (That’s Bickering, as in debates, and Victory, as in, Look out for my dust.)
In Nevada and South Carolina, I intend to remind the voters-No Campaign-No Gain!  Wanta know why?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7B2VMCHXpA
Now if that doesn’t make you want to loose weight, vote or just get sick to your stomach, you’re not human. Vote for me anyway!
This trip to the south and west is going to require a lot of patience and persistence.  We will have to travel long distances to canvas these states and help the voters know that “The Real Donald” is coming to the rescue:
Of course, they will have to remember that my campaign vehicle has some limitations, remember?
Inline image 1

Hey Mark, where’s my back-up cow? This mare is looking tired. She’s already seen thousands of miles and every time I say “Hi Ho Silver” she just ignores me.
Maybe, we need a little Carpool Karoke to perk her up?
I think this mare will giddy-up after hearing that inspiring music. Whatcha think?
I have heard that the voters in Nevada are distraught with the options for the presidency this year.  They are looking for someone with more courage to take on our enemies in the world.  Someone, who has the heart to care about our local citizens in America and someone, with the brains to figure out E=MCsquared.  I have a couple of ideas for them:
or this option may even TRUMP (pun intended) the wizard:

Mew World Order: Siberian City Backs Cat for Mayor

by The Associated Press                         

BARNAUL, Russia — Tired of the dog-eat-dog politics in their Russian city, the residents of Barnaul say they want a cat to be their next mayor.

The Siberian city of 650,000 people, which lies 1,800 miles east of Moscow, is to get a new mayor next week when a commission comprising the city council and the regional governor choose from among six candidates.

<img class=”img-responsive img_inline” src=”http://media3.s-nbcnews.com/j/newscms/2015_51/1347361/151219-cat-mayor-1957_a80c35b0cdac39e9626d4d307a627554.nbcnews-fp-360-360.jpg” alt=”Image:” title=”Image:” itemprop=”image”/> Image:

A Siamese cat named Barsik in Barnaul, on Saturday, Dec. 19, 2015. AP

But none of the six appear to spark much affection among Barnaul’s residents. An informal online poll asking residents to express their preferences among the six and a Siamese cat named Barsik showed the feline nabbing more than 90 percent of the vote.

Barsik has attracted much amused attention in the Russian news media. Still, some local politicians understand there’s a more serious message coming from the people of Barnaul, which like many Russian cities has been riddled with alleged corruption.                   

“Through the image of Barsik the cat, our people are sending definite wishes to the future head of Barnaul,” says regional Gov. Alexander Karlin.

“The conclusion has been made that there’s absolutely no trust among voters for any of the candidates,” said local Communist Party official, Ivan Karpov.

The Associated Press
Topics World
First Published Dec 19 2015, 8:05 pm ET
We will definitely need Justin’s help to translate, if the Cat decides to run for president. He’ll have to translate for the cat, all of the slanderous statements made against him, from the other candidates who worry he may win.  ME?  I’m not worried if a cat wins, I’ll just go to work for Ralston-Purina and make a mint selling wholesome cat chow.
Well, there you have it folks.
One parting message: “I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress.  Ronald Reagan
I guess, I wonder the same thing?
Vote The Real Donald✌
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The Donald Campaign Message 02/07/2016

Whew!
We just made it through the Iowa Caucus and now we’re on our way to winning New Hampshire this week.  As usual, it will require our greatest effort to convince the “Granite State” citizens that our campaign supports their “Live free or Die” motto, as much as, we support corn syrup subsidies in Iowa. In January 1776 it became the first of the British North American colonies to establish a government independent of Great Britain‘s authority and it was the first to establish its own state constitution.
I’m pretty sure this state is “wrapped up” (no pun intended) because they have “no sales tax” which means they’ll love my “no new taxes” sandwich which I will provide while visiting each city in the state.
Basically, the sandwich will consist of 2 pieces of bread, hardened like granite, no meat (we don’t want their cholesterol to go up),  2 pickles, 1 leaf of “dyed, blue lettuce to represent their state flag, and mustard on the bread that states, “Live free or die.”  I already did a “feasibility study” in the state.  Two people agreed it was the worse tasting sandwich they have ever eaten but, it was perfect because it reminded them of how gov’t is run.  Blah! Blah! Blah!  It was a hit!
I’m fully confident that they will eagerly accept my proposal for “Curbs on funding from traffic tickets.” The following article in the Deseret News explains my rationale,

SALT LAKE CITY — A state lawmaker says the small Box Elder County town of Mantua is a speed trap.

Sen. Lyle Hillyard, R-Logan, said one-third of the town’s budget is supported by traffic ticket revenue.

“This is the only place I get complaints about in my district,” he told the Senate Transportation and Public Utilities and Technology Committee on Monday.

Hillyard is sponsoring SB100, which would cap the amount of revenue a municipality can collect from traffic tickets at 25 percent of its budget. The committee sent the bill to the full Senate with a unanimous recommendation.

Mantua is a town of 687 residents, according to the 2010 census. The town is not specifically listed in the proposed legislation, but Hillyard says he is sponsoring the bill because he’s had many constituents complain about getting tickets there.

Other states have imposed similar revenue caps, he said, including Virginia, Missouri, Oklahoma and Florida.

While there has historically been many fatal car crashes in Sardine Canyon, Hillyard said the concrete barriers that now divide the highway have increased safety in the canyon and strict policing is not as needed as it once was.

Mantua Mayor and Police Chief Mike Johnson says the improved safety in the canyon has nothing to do with the barriers.

“In all the time I spent with the highway patrol, I never saw those barriers on the highway stop any accidents or do away with fatal accidents,” he said.

Johnson said police recently ticketed someone for going 108 mph in a 60 mph zone, and that there are frequently cars traveling more than 90 mph there.

Four DUI arrests since Dec. 1, he said, has made the area safer for both Mantua residents and Hillyard’s constituents in Logan.

“I think that we’re sending a message and getting people to slow down,” Johnson said.

Johnson is Mantua’s one full-time police officer, and there are three additional part-time officers.

To clear up misconceptions, Mantua financial analyst Lorrie Herd presented the actual revenue generated by the tickets.

Herd said 42 to 43 percent of the revenue goes back to the state. Last year, that left the town with $246,000. The cost of funding the police department and court system takes roughly $229,000 a year, leaving the town with $17,000.

This year, revenue from July 1 through Dec. 31 leaves the town with a net of $23,000, she said. After around $14,000 is taken out to help fund the fire department, the town will have gained a net of approximately $9,000.

If Hillyard’s bill passes, Herd says Mantua will have a budget shortfall of more than $100,000.

Anyone who wants to Live free or die, can’t stand traffic tickets!

SCORE:The Real Donald ..2 other candidates 0.

Now the other advantage “The Real Donald” and the “The Real First Lady” have is that we have lived in New England. We know that people there are down to earth.  They don’t like to mess around.  They have everything under control.  Just watch: The Shemp vs an ironing board for 1 minute 29 seconds.

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=shemp+vs+an+ironing+board

So, there you have it.  New Hampshire is a slam dunk.  Once they see this video and I explain how I would get things done in Washington, well, it’s “ALL ABOARD”  to the Nations Capital.

SCORE: The Real Donald..3 other candidates ).

Wish me well this week or Wish me Happy Birthday or Wish me to go away.

It’s the Bowl of Super alias The Real Donald✌

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The Donald Campaign Message 01/31/2016

Well, here we go folks.  The Iowa Caucus is this week and the New Hampshire Primary is close behind.  All of the candidates are now worried because “The Real Donald” campaign has gained so much momentum in such a short time.  In fact newspaper headlines describe the disarray the other campaign’s face in realizing the trouble they may encounter. “Feuds flare up as clock ticks down toward caucuses in Iowa.” Deseret News, January 31, 2016.
It’s going go be a real horse race to the finish. Just watch:
Did you see all of my opponents riding those horses. Are you worried about them? Probably, because they have a few bumps and bruises from falling off those thoroughbreds.
Soon, I’ll be riding circles around them;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgwJyQ-YdJc
It’s time for this campaign to take on a “Theme Song” so, here’s mine:
 
Now is the time to put all of these great ideas from the last 3 months together to push this campaign over the top. The American people want to see someone who can create jobs. Not that everyone wants to work but, I would promote factories in the U.S. to build iwheelchairs and icouches.  I would likely call them zwheelchairs and zcouches because the poor letter “Z” always gets left in the dark. Last in the alphabet, hardly any words start with Z and most people, who would buy and race these wheelchairs and lie on the couches that move from the family room to the kitchen, would probably be catching up on their Zzzzzz’s.
 
Well, I definitely want people to get back to work. Such talent out there that’s untapped.  We want citizens that know how to keep up with technology and more importantly, they find solutions to problems and “think on their feet.”
 
Here’s a couple that know how to do it right:
Remember, Vote The Real Donald, the one who knows how to ride the horse to the end of the race. ✌
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The Donald Campaign Message 01/24/2016

Poll: Public doubts Washington’s problem-solving ability–Deseret News Sunday, January 24th, 2016
“As the first voting nears in the presidential race, most Americans have little to no confidence in the federal government to confront what they see as the country’s most important priorities, according to a national survey.”  This poll, conducted in December, found more than 6 in 10 respondents expressed only slight confidence—or none at all—that the federal government can make progress on the problems facing the nation in 2016.”
Now for my question.  How is this any different than the sentiments the American public felt in 2012, the last presidential year or what about the 1960 campaign or 1972?  Yep, the answer to that quiz question is D., all of the above.  In other words, these are the same doubts we, as Americans have had for the last 50 years, at least.  Here are, I believe, some of the reasons.
1) “Mia Love, Representative from the Utah Congress wants to crack down on Congress dumping controversial legislation into unrelated, must-pass bills in the middle of the night. She has introduced a measure to limit bills in Congress to one subject at a time.  It would prevent lawmakers from bundling things together or folding legislation into large appropriations bills. ” NOW THIS IS NOVEL “Each bill would rise and fall on its own merits. Members of both parties have made a habit of passing complex, thousand-page bills without hearings, amendments or debate,” Love said.  That process and the collusion that goes with it are why we a $18 trillion in debt and why the American people have lost trust in elected officials.”  By the way, good for Mia Love.
 
Yes, this indeed used to be and probably still is called “Earmark’s” or “Pork Barrel Spending.”  
 
Ok, so think of this.  A thousand page bill, which by the way is probably the shortest of the bills, come on, who is going to read it? The running average number of bills passed each year by Congress is 758.  That’s 758,000 pages!
No way, you say!
 
Solution: Yep, As President, I would support Mia’s proposal. It is better.  One bill, one subject pass it or not! No back-room deals.  I bet George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and even Paul Revere would support me.
“One if by land, and two if by sea!”  Shine the lights on this baby.
 
2) Why else do American’s feel the government can’t solve the IMPORTANT issues?
 
Well, here are a couple of thoughts from noted men in history:
 
“In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.” 
    JOHN ADAMS, second US president
 
“Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.”
     Mark Twain
 
or here’s one that reminds me of Justin’s dialogue in “Homeowners Political Plight.”
 
“Congress is so strange.  A man gets up to speak and says nothing.  Nobody listens—-and then everybody disagrees.”
      Boris Marshalov (not sure who he is but he has it right)
 
Is there any wonder why the American people are fed Up?  It may be time for a second American Revolution.  Let’s get a President and a Congress who want to get things done. Identify each problem, of which, there are now 62 billion 372 million on and on and on that need to be addressed because our Congress has been so inept and they just want to sit and “eat pork barrel” sandwiches.
 
3) Any President who is elected today, has to have a sense of humor because he/she is basically, joining the circus.  Think, Hogle Zoo1
 
Here’s one who knew how to do it:
 
 
I like this approach else, why would I be doing what I am doing right now.  Stay tune for next week!
 
Vote the Real Donald ✌
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The Donald Campaign Message 01/17/2016

To anyone who cares, would like to care or may care in the future,
Last week I addressed some of the new concerns we face as a nation.  Specifically, who do we turn to when we, as a people, need help?  The old days are gone! Yep, Sayonara, Adios, Ciao, Au reveoir, Ahn youn hee ka se yo, arrivederci, bi xatre te, da svidaniya, ha det or my personal favorite—————–See Ya Pal!
It use to be you could turn to almost anyone, to get directions when you were lost, when you ran out of gas, couldn’t find something in a store, or were caught in a snowstorm in Melrose, New Mexico.  Well, that ain’t going to happen today.  First of all, if you go into a service station and say I’m lost, can you help me get to_______ (fill in the blank), the attendant doesn’t speak your language (probably one of the above languages), he looks at you like you just escaped from one of the pens at the Hogle Zoo, or he thinks you can just use your GPS in the car.  Guess what? A 1991 Nissan Sentra, by the name of Rambo, doesn’t, I repeat, doesn’t have GPS.  As a matter of fact, my campaign vehicle, which you’ve already seen in prior newsletters, will never have GPS.  I don’t want to taint my vehicle.  I want to get to those little towns on my own, with a map, and occasionally with the help of someone WHO CARES!  Most people can’t help you get where you want to go because they don’t know how to get there either.  Why? They don’t know how to read a map or they can’t speak your language or they just escaped from a pen at the Hogle Zoo!
What about if you run out of gas? Better arm yourself with a howitzer because no one will stop, you don’t know which pen at the zoo they escaped from or they drive an electric car and don’t know what gas is anyway. Why they say, do you need gas, as they drive away.  Heaven forbid, if you ask for help to find something in a store.  First the person growls at you, second they tell you they aren’t paid enough (minimum wage of $15 an hour) or they really don’t know where it is in the store either.  The stores turn over employees ever 7 and a half seconds.
Yes, we are a nation in trouble! Oh, we got trouble. Just watch…………
Yes, we are at the tipping point, just like Aldous Huxley suggests in his book “Brave New World.”  Although the novel is set in the future it deals with contemporary issues of the early 20th century. An early trip to the United States gave Brave New World much of its character. Not only was Huxley outraged by the culture of youth, commercial cheeriness and sexual promiscuity, and the inward-looking nature of many Americans, he had also found the book My Life and Work by Henry Ford on the boat to America, and he saw the book’s principles applied in everything he encountered after leaving San Francisco.[16]
Others running for President in 2016, have missed the boat.  They think everything is Hunky Dorey!  Why should we talk to each other? Why should we care about others? Why should we help others get out of the convenience store in Melrose, Texas.  Let’s let the government do it.  After all, they already provide us with Medicare, Medicaid, free cell phones, Social Insecurity, and a dozen other programs so, we don’t have to work the rest of our lives.  Put us in the pens, and tell us when the “food is in the trough” and we’ll come eat.
 
Well, I have a solution. It’s called the Marshmellow Test, or the Delayed Gratification Test. Everyone in America has been trained to “want everything, now. Right Now!  And by the way, I want it my way–who cares about others!
Here’s the test……

The Stanford marshmallow experiment[1] was a series of studies on delayed gratification in the late 1960s and early 1970s led by psychologist Walter Mischel, then a professor at Stanford University. In these studies, a child was offered a choice between one small reward provided immediately or two small rewards if they waited for a short period, approximately 15 minutes, during which the tester left the room and then returned. (The reward was sometimes a marshmallow, but often a cookie or a pretzel.) In follow-up studies, the researchers found that children who were able to wait longer for the preferred rewards tended to have better life outcomes, as measured by SAT scores,[2] educational attainment,[3] body mass index (BMI),[4] and other life measures.[5]

Here’s what the test looks like with kids,
So, there you go.  Adults act a lot like kids! We want our marshmallow now.  We need a paradigm shift.  After all, anyone who’s going to provide a “better life outcome” by serving marshmallows is on to something.  Let’s talk about that next week.
Vote for the Real Donald✌ Marshmallows for everyone!

 

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The Donald Campaign Message 01/10/2016

 

“Where’s the Beef?”  Watch this!
All of the other candidates running this year, for any party, have a lot of “bun” but no beef!
That’s right, very little substance. Why? Because they forget that the great citizens of America always ask the same questions each Presidential cycle but, the candidates never really give a full, direct answer.  For example: when Bernie Sanders is asked if he is a socialist? Here’s his response:

Appearing on NBC’s Meet the Press, Sanders engaged with host Chuck Todd in a easy back-and-forth regarding his brand of socialism.

“Alright,” began Todd, “You joked about the idea when people call you a socialist, you say, ‘Yes, I’m going to make everybody wear the same color pajamas.’”

“Especially you,” replied Sanders.

“Especially me?” asked the host.

“I have a pair of pajamas just for you,” said the candidate.

Now, my take on this is that “I like to have people wearing different pajama’s.”  I don’t think our Founding Fathers or the Constitution ever intended for us all to wear the same pajama’s. After all some like bears and some like turtles.

One of the other major issues in this election is Terrorism.  Ever heard of that topic in the newspapers, on radio, or the T.V. lately?  What the other candidates don’t understand is that religion has been a “bone of contention” for people for about a billion years.  Ever heard of the Crusades?  Seems people don’t like other people who are not the same religion even though, most of the people will tell you that their religion tells them to “love each other” and “forgive each other” and “turn the other cheek.”  Too much bun, not enough beef!

I have a simple answer, everyone that wants to be a terrorist has to sit in the same room with other people they don’t like and watch “Lion King” together.  Half way through, they will all stand, join hands and sing “Hakuna Matata” several hundred times until they all want to hug each other and never have a “disposition to do evil.”  Look it works, just watch!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xB5ceAruYrI

And finally, for this week, y’all know we went to the great state of Texas between Christmas and New Years.  Well, we got stranded in a snow storm in Melrose, New Mexico. We, along with 53 other people, either slept in a convenience store, on the floor, with no heat or lights, or in our cars in the parking lot overnight. Now, that may sound bad but, it wasn’t half bad.  The problem was, the next day we had to deal with the local highway patrol officer who also spent the night, and who waited for some of us to finally gather everyone together and decide we would get out of Dodge.  After he heard me say, “We’re going” he said, “me too.”  We also had the privilege of dealing with a rear wheel drive plow, with bad passenger tires who got stuck, that’s right stuck, not once, but twice trying to plow the snow.  Guess who got the plow unstuck?  Yes, indeed y’all, it was the 15 men and boys from the convenience store with shovels!!!!!!!  It doesn’t end there.  Once we got the plow unstuck, he drove away, never to be seen again.  Now there’s government at its best.  Then, after we set up a caravan of cars and trucks to forge ahead for 30 minutes to Clovis, we first ran into the Highway Patrolman, who after we got him through the snow, went out in front for a while until, a herd of cows, that broke out of a fence, ran down the highway and we find this fine officer herding cows in his patrol car down the highway.  He honked, they ran, but not in the direction he wanted them to.

Here’s the clincher.  Once through Clovis, on our way to Muleshoe, we encounter, a pickup towing a camper trailer jackknifed in the middle of the road.  Not to worry, a 6000 pound Farm Tractor comes to the rescue and promptly gets stuck in a drift.  Now the entire road is blocked and 40 mile an hour winds are blowing drifts around these 2 vehicles.  Again, not to worry!  The town sends out a grader but what’s this, the grader can’t push the snow, it’s too deep.  So the driver decides to turn around, go back to town and get a front loader.  In the meantime, a massive Army vehicle from Fort Cannon comes to tow the Farm Tractor out of the way but, what’s this, he can’t get his vehicle to the tractor because the snow is too deep so, he turns around and goes back to town.  Thirty minutes later, a front loader starts back to the blocked road but, by now, the police tell him to go back to town and come the next morning.  So, 20 to 30 cars and semi’s watch this preposterous display of ineptness on the highway.  Our government at work!  The moral of the story?  This is hard to believe but, in a age of cell phones, which worked, can’t one person call the grader, the front loader and the massive army vehicle and tell them all, to come at the same time. They could have cleared the highway in 30 minutes.  Instead, Clovis filled up all of their hotels that night.

By now, you get my drift—-no pun intended!  Gov’t doesn’t work very well and heaven forbid if we have an emergency.  Better to go to the funeral parlor and pick out your coffin. 

As President, I intend to fix this by giving every emergency vehicle a can, a long string and an edict to call each other and coordinate their matchbox trucks at the same time.

To prepare you for next week, watch this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umrp1tIBY8Q

Yes, “The beat Goes On”

Vote The Real Donald to Save Our Country ✌ 

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The Donald Campaign Message 01/03/2016

Welcome to 2016- the year of the New President!

Who will it be? I am sure you are asking yourself that very question, right now.  Will it be someone you choose or will it be someone the “others choose?”  Who are the “others?” They are the ones that spend no time researching the candidates, in fact, they don’t even care to know what the platform is for the candidate they will vote for in the election.  They just vote for gender or for someone who promises to give them phones or someone who “best of all” says one thing and does another, knowingly.

Well, next week, at the request of my supporters, I will address some non-economic issues that face our nation.  But tonight, I am changing course for one week, to do what my esteemed colleagues will not do and that is to address religion and spiritual goals for the year.

As we were returning home from Muleshoe, Mom, Cody and I read the first lesson for Gospel Doctrine.  The Book of Mormon is the ‘keystone” of our religion.  Now, this is not new to most of us but, there were quotes that I thought were pertinent to making 2016 a good, better, maybe perfect year for our families. We know the Book of Mormon was written for our time so what does it tell us?  What conditions did Moroni foresee would exist in the world when the BOM was again brought forth?

“The power of God shall be denied” (verse 28) Is this true today? We had an active discussion in the car and each of us enumerated ways God is denied His rightful place in our world.  It’s interesting to note that in the movie, “Unbroken” the crux of the movie is on Zamperini’s extraordinary life and survival during wartime.  What Hollywood didn’t show, was that the Lord intervened in his life when he was at, perhaps the worst time of his life, after the war.

“There shall be great pollutions upon the face of the earth.” (verse 31).  We discussed whether this was literal pollution or a pollution of spirit among today’s people.  Cody said one of his professor’s at BYU stated, in many cases, these types of verses refer to both.

People will “lift themselves up in the pride of their hearts” (verse 36).  Is this apparent today? What does entitlement mean today?

People will “love money…more than they will love the poor and the needy” (verse 37) That’s funny! Don’t we see more and more, that every decision that is made, in corporate America, and in local America, is all about money?  Why do they start college games at 9:00 pm at night? Who really comprises the poor and needy?

People will be “ashamed to take upon themselves the name of Christ.”  Do we find as Elder Perry stated, “the minority masquerading as the majority” when it comes to taking down nativity scenes in towns, making sure we say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas because we don’t want to offend people on Christ’s Birthday. For Heaven’s Sake, whose birthday is it anyway, Happy Holidays? If they don’t like us saying Merry Christmas, then they don’t have to celebrate the 25th.  Maybe, these people can celebrate someone else’s birthday in June, if they like.

As I stated, each of the major writers of the BOM testified that he wrote for future generations.  …If they saw our day and chose those things which would be of greatest worth to us, is not that how we should study the Book of Mormon? We should constantly ask, ourselves, “Why did the Lord inspire Mormon or Moroni or Alma to include that in his record?

Now for goals: Mom and I have found through the years that if, in January, we set spiritual goals, family goals, financial goals, business or work goals and personal goals (e.g.) reading a book we’ve wanted to read or exercise etc., we do better. For us these goals are simple, just something we want to accomplish that year. In most years, we have progressed far more than in years we haven’t written down these goals. We don’t try to get to elaborate or write too many goals under each category but, even one goal makes you feel a sense of accomplishment, if you achieve it, at the end of the year. You might try it, if you aren’t already.

And finally, attached is a blank copy of our Budget Tracker.  You may need to eliminate certain rows that don’t fit your specific needs.  Our tracker has become quite lengthy through the years because of the size of our family. Obviously, mortgage can change to rent for some of you.  I then put in the formulas to add rows left to right or top to bottom.  The top section is basic, monthly costs, whereas the bottom third of the page are expenses that happen occasionally.  It’s interesting that every financial planner told us that 90% of people don’t keep track of their monthly/yearly expenses so they don’t really know how much they spend per month or what they spend it on.  This may be a good, simple document to start a budget and tracking your expenses.  I’m sure there are other good documents but this one has worked for us.

Well, my fellow lemonade drinkers, all is well in Zion! Have a fun week and keep your chin up!

Love and vote, Donald ✌

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The Donald Campaign Message 12/27/2015

Dear Citizens, Countrymen, Countrywomen and anyone else interested in knowing why Pluto should still be considered a planet, in my humble opinion;
First, an update on the status of my financial contributions and the success of my campaign.  While many of my colleagues and competitors in this Presidential campaign require large sums of money from their Political Action Committees (PACs) and Billionaire donations to survive the long, grueling months ahead, I can assure those who support me that my campaign will remain solvent from start to finish.  I will not require last minute donations from supporters and I will not go into debt, as many of those running for this esteemed office, have encountered in the last 10 elections.  As a result, I will not be beholden to any PAC and I will not find myself in a position to give VIP appointments (i.e Ambassador to the Tibetan people in the Himilayas) to those who have given me a billion dollars.
The reason I have this distinct pleasure is that, so far, my total received revenue, which by the way is audited by the venerable (Deloitte, Touche and Tohmatsu Accounting firm) is $0.00 dollars.  My total expenditures, to date, are $0.00.
Now, for the Real Donald speech of the week;
As I mentioned last week, a key to fixing this mess we are in nationally, is to be fiscally responsible. We can’t continue to spend, spend, spend and then consider increasing taxes to our citizens.  Here are some interesting facts for the American people to consider and our politicians to digest.
1) The federal tax code was 400 pages in 1913. In 2010 it was 70,000 pages.
2) The Bible has about 700,000 words.  The number of words in the Federal Tax Code: 3,700,000.
My take on that: If God can say everything He needs to tell us in 700,000 words than why would it take 5 times that many words to tell us we basically work for the government.  We need to simplify.  By the way, who actually understands this code anyway?  Any chance for a mistake to be made?
  • While we’re talking about documents that govern our lives but, that no one understands, how about the Consumer Price Index.  So, what is it and why does it matter?  Well, here’s how the gov’t defines it: The Consumer Price Index (CPI) is a measure of the average change over time in the prices paid by urban consumers for a market basket of consumer goods and services.
  • Ok, that sounds pretty straight forward doesn’t it?  We should see from this definition why the cost of goods, we buy as consumers, go up or down (which never happens).

  • Question: What goods and services does the Consumer Price Index (CPI) cover?

    Answer: The CPI represents all goods and services purchased for consumption by the reference population (Consumer Price Index for All Urban Consumers or Consumer Price Index for Urban Wage Earners and Clerical Workers). The Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS) has classified all expenditure items into more than 200 categories, arranged into eight major groups. Major groups and examples of categories in each are as follows:

    • FOOD AND BEVERAGES (breakfast cereal, milk, coffee, chicken, wine, full service meals and snacks);
    • HOUSING (rent of primary residence, owners’ equivalent rent, fuel oil, bedroom furniture);
    • APPAREL (men’s shirts and sweaters, women’s dresses, jewelry);
    • TRANSPORTATION (new vehicles, airline fares, gasoline, motor vehicle insurance);
    • MEDICAL CARE (prescription drugs and medical supplies, physicians’ services, eyeglasses and eye care, hospital services);
    • RECREATION (televisions, cable television, pets and pet products, sports equipment, admissions);
    • EDUCATION AND COMMUNICATION (college tuition, postage, telephone services, computer software and accessories);
    • OTHER GOODS AND SERVICES (tobacco and smoking products, haircuts and other personal services, funeral expenses).

    Also included within these major groups are various government-charged user fees, such as water and sewerage charges, auto registration fees, and vehicle tolls. The CPI also includes taxes, such as sales and excise taxes, that are directly associated with the prices of specific goods and services. However, the CPI excludes taxes, such as income and Social Security taxes, not directly associated with the purchase of consumer goods and services.

    Here’s my question: When a box of cereal, let’s say Wheaties, costs $2.98 for 16 ounces  (18.7 cents per ounce)in January, now in December, it costs $3.00 so the CPI says it was a marginal increase of .07% increase for the year.  Not much, huh?  BUT!  The same box, is now only 14.2ounces or (21.1 cents per ounce) does the CPI calculate that difference?  My guess is no.   Many of these goods in the market basket probably change like that over time.  Gas has such large season swings that it tends to offset the increase in goods and make the whole basket look less expensive than it is. Well, my point is that the CPI is not on the radar for my opponents.  Frankly, they don’t consider it and better yet they don’t care.

  • Second  question: If this CPI only covers urban consumers, what happens to rural consumers?  I guess they don’t use any of the above products? or maybe, they just don’t count!  Jen and Mark, you’re off the hook because you’re not urban. Technically, Bountiful is not an urban area but it is considered an urban cluster so, I think mom and I, and Justin and Emily, Troy and Kelsi, and soon, Kelby and Mallory will be in an urban cluster or rural too. So, don’t worry about inflation either, because it doesn’t affect you either.
If you ask me, the following individuals should be in a Market Research Study.  They should be included in a Focus Group and they should be asked questions about “What do you think about the CPI?” You’ll want to seen this one1
Well, where does all this lead me in the “Real Donald” campaign? Simply said: The other candidates are barking up the wrong tree!  They are addressing the wrong issues.  The issues I have listed each week, are the issues most voters are looking to us, as candidates, for answers.
 
The banner that is unfurled, should include the issues, I have listed. 
 
As a concluding remark for this week.  Why does everyone keep picking on Pluto.  First, they say it is a planet, then they say it isn’t. Here’s why:
 
This group decided that Pluto was not really a planet because of its size and location in space. So Pluto and objects like it are now called dwarf planets. Pluto is also called a plutoid. A plutoid is a dwarf planet that is farther out in space than the planet Neptune.
 
Did they just discover that Pluto was small? I thought they knew this decades ago. Did they just discover that Pluto is way out there? Past Neptune? I thought they knew this too.  Are these scientists just discovering science?
I do have to admit that I think it is nice that Pluto is now called a plutoid.  That name has a “catchy” ring to it. 
 
In my Presidency, Pluto will be returned to its rightful status as a planet.  Maybe, I’ll also require those choosing to become citizens of the USA to define plutoid. Maybe, anyone who wants to vote in the upcoming election should be required to define plutoid?
And, besides that, Disney named one of their favorite dog characters after the planet Pluto.  What other planet in our system has that distinction.
Vote: The Real Donald in 2016, it will make you happy!
Donald ✌
 
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The Donald Campaign Message 12/6/2015

Dear Staffee,
That’s the familiar form of staff.  It shows love, devotion, humility and, and quite frankly, it gives a big bear hug to each of you without being present.  It also leads me into some of my recent findings on political persuasion and what this country is lacking today.
First; If you haven’t noticed recently, there seem to be a lot of people that are watching the example of our politicians in Washington.  (See my diatribe from last week regarding their lack of “friendliness” toward each other.)  People are not getting along very well. When kids grow up in this world they often look up to other people, whether it’s their parents, older siblings, aunts, uncles or someone they admire and want to emulate.  The problem is, it’s getting harder to find anyone to admire.  Athlete’s?  that doesn’t work.  Their too busy getting overpaid. Some are using what we’ll call “not so good stuff” to enhance performance.  Take a look at our track stars, “Tour de France” bicyclists, baseball players, football players, weight lifting, you bet.  I haven’t heard of problems in ballet yet but, …….?   So let’s go to business leaders.  Heard about any political contribution problems lately?  Any automobile manufacturers with mileage inflation problems?  Parents must be watching a lot of C-Span lately, because they disagree with each other to the point that they won’t share cell phones, drink out of the same cup and just don’t live at the same address anymore.  How about movie stars? oops! that one isn’t worth wasting typing space over.  Politicians? A Deseret News article dated Jan 23rd, 2014 lists 20 notable politicians convicted of crimes since 2000.  What should we do?  I’ll list some antidotes to this mess next week.
Second, Debt!  How do we convince our best and brightest to balance their home budget when Washington, hasn’t the faintest idea how to do it especially, if they want to get reelected in the next election.  We hurt feelings when we balance a budget.  So, they say, let’s just pass along the problem to the next administration or generation.  They actually, whisper this statement so that no one who votes for them is within hearing distance of their comment.
And a third national problem, that may eclipse all other major national issues for decades.  Cereal.  That’s right, Cereal.  Anyone notice lately that cereal, the national food of champions, think Wheaties, is now packaged in smaller boxes.  Yes, the 24 ounce box you once loved, which cost about $2.00 is now a 13.2 ounce box for $3.29, on sale.  Now, the manufactures didn’t spring this one on us overnight.  They followed the CIA formula.  Be covert.  Pretend that consumers are basically stupid, even though the number of educated citizens is on the increase in the U.S.  First, we’ll make the box a little shorter, with fewer ounces.  Then, we’ll make the inner plastic bags with less tear material so the consumer can’t rip the bag open without sending cereal into the stratosphere.  Ah, next will make the box thinner.  The consumer will never know that their entire hand now wraps around the whole box.  Ounces, now 12.375.  Cost, $3.49 but, with natural ingredients.  Never mind that it’s still oats and rice.  That consumer couldn’t tell the difference anyway at least, they feel healthy and their cholesterol is down a 1/4 of a point. At least Mikey doesn’t care….see attached video!
Mikey Likes Life
About a year ago, I kidded a very important person in my life, that the day was coming when we would see a single serving size of cereal for $2.00.  I thought this would happen in my lifetime.  Blow me away!  Two weeks ago, we saw cereal on the shelves, just a little over a single serving, two for $3.00.  The manufactures are sneaky, kind of like the NSA, you get 2 for $3.00.  A $1.50 a piece.  Next time in, watch, single serving for $2.00.  Holy Toledo! (Ever wonder where this term came from?) Speculation is; the heavy concentration of churches on Collingwood Boulevard.
Where is all of this leading to for “The Real Donald” campaign?  Stay tuned next week for answers to these perplexing national issues.  This Donald doesn’t mind tackling the tough issues head-on.
May your week be filled with nothing but positive experiences. No Murphy’s!
Donald✌
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